Giving Her An Orgasm - Chapter 2: Six Steps to Female Orgasm
Step 2: Talk to Her
Some techniques that you use may work great on some women, but not on others. Every woman is different and many of them have wildly different things that turn them on.
Communicate with her. Find out what turns her on the most. Try a technique on her then gauge her response. Let her tell you how fast to go, how slow or how deep. This will allow you to adjust your techniques until you have found the ones that will result in her orgasm.
What if your partner isn’t comfortable vocalizing her pleasure? Not a problem. She can just as easily tell you what gives her pleasure with a moan or by tensing her body. Pay close attention to what makes her back arch or makes her moan louder.
If you talk to her, she will help guide you to her orgasm. She will give you all the signs you need. All you have to do is pay attention.
Step 3: Increase Her Level of Pleasure
The level of pleasure is increased much easier in a man than it is in a woman. When sex feels good to you; you feel the urge to go faster. This will bring you close to orgasm, but what about her? If you go faster to increase your pleasure; it will do her no good because you will reach orgasm well before she is ready.
Men have two stages to reach an orgasm. We get aroused, we ejaculate. It’s as simple as that for us.
Women are much different. Women need to have their level of pleasure steadily increased before she reaches a level of arousal that allows her to have an orgasm.
You must increase her level of arousal with each stage of her sexual responses. (We will go over these responses in the next chapter).
Step 4: Tease Her
One of the most effective methods of raising a woman’s level of arousal is teasing. The techniques that you use during sex will be amplified by mixing them with teasing. Many times, the amount of pleasure a woman feels depends on her level of anticipation. Teasing excites her and the anticipation of intense pleasure sometimes perpetuates that pleasure. Her mind is occupied on the anticipation rather than trying to reach an orgasm.
The more you tease, the more anticipation she will feel. This adds to her level of arousal and builds up the energy inside of her that is needed to achieve orgasm.
Her arousal builds up into an explosion of pleasure. That explosion is the female orgasm.
The best way to build anticipation is to play around in the areas that give her pleasure. Don’t hit her spot directly. Play around it and tease her. Make her anticipate you hitting those spots. That way, when you do hit the spots, her level of pleasure is increased.
I will give you an idea of what I’m talking about. When performing oral sex; kiss her inner thighs. Touch the edge of the lips of her vagina then back away. Caress her legs and reach your hand up and caress her breasts. Make her think you are going for her vagina, but only touch it a little at a time. She will get very wet and come closer to orgasm before you even go in.
Keep in mind that when you are teasing her, you are also teasing yourself. Make sure to be mindful of your arousal as well. Don’t overdue and bring yourself too close to orgasm. Just keep a steady build of sexual tension until the climax.
Step 5: Keep Her Relaxed
If you want a woman to have an orgasm; make sure that she is relaxed and her only tension is sexual tension.
You don’t want her body to become tense. She can’t be preoccupied in any way or be conscious of trying to have an orgasm. If her body is tense, she will not be able to have a full release.
So, what are you supposed to do?
Soothe her in any way you can. Talk to her and touch her softly. Make her feel special and desirable. Make her feel calm like she doesn’t have a care in the world. Watch as the tension in her body melts away and turns to arousal.
Step 6: Put Her Needs First
Before she makes any effort to increase your arousal; you must be sure to arouse her first.
Why do you have to give sexual pleasure before her?
It’s simple. First of all; if you give her an orgasm, she is going to try that much harder to please you. Also, once you give her the first orgasm, the next one will come faster and more intense during sex. Besides; you are also showing her that you have some self-control and you put her needs first.
If you don’t believe me, try it yourself. Try getting a blowjob before you give a woman an orgasm. Then try it after you give her an orgasm. You are sure to see a drastic change in how hard she tries to please you with that blowjob after you have just given her an orgasm.
The same rule applies to sex in general. Give her pleasure and she will give it back to you even more intensely.